From Counterfeit Love to the Love of God

I was seeking a love shaped and whispered into my mind by the movies I watched and the songs I listened to. So often, we don’t realize how deeply what we see and hear can mold the way we understand the world — and even how we imagine love itself.

I clung to movies like Dirty Dancing, one of the first that comes to mind as I reflect. As a young girl, I would spend hours pretending to walk across the bridge as Baby did, foot slide and all, wondering what it would be like for my very own Patrick Swayze to come and rescue me with those famous words: “Nobody puts Baby in the corner.”

Then, as I entered my teenage years, it became Jerry Maguire and Armageddon, and finally, in adulthood, The Notebook. And let’s not forget reading those Nicholas Sparks novels — right alongside the Fifty Shades of Grey series. I did not have a true understanding of love. All of this left me seeking a fairy tale — a love imagined from stories, movies, and songs — rather than the true, unshakable love of God.

I carried a very unrealistic view of love, and with it came expectations that could never be met. Satan thrives in our ignorance. I grew up hearing the saying, “Knowledge is power,” but I never realized just how true and necessary that was.

God’s love is beautiful, pure, and steadfast, yet I had only known the imitation — the counterfeit love that Satan spreads. I was familiar with the shadows of love, but not with the radiant love that flows only from God.

I began to mistake control, jealousy, and other forms of abuse for signs of love. I didn’t yet know the truth of love because I hadn’t yet learned the words of 1 Corinthians 13:4–7.

I believed that if I loved someone hard enough, I could change them. In my mind, love had the power to fix everything and transform everyone. Though we are all called to love, I misunderstood the assignment. The love I thought I knew was only a fragile imitation of the perfect, steadfast love that comes only from God.

I had to learn the truth about what love really is — not the lies the world had convinced me were true.

How did I do this, you may ask?

I had to tear down the strongholds that had been rooted deeply in my heart from a young age. The only way to tear down strongholds is to replace the lies we once believed with the truth, and the truth is found in the Word of God.

So, I began by writing out 1 Corinthians 13 in a chart. On one side, I would place the word patient and its definition; across from it, I would write impatient and its definition. I was literally rewiring my brain, learning to recognize what true love looks like one truth at a time.

In this discovery of truth, I also discovered the agape love of God — a love that is unconditional, sacrificial, and steadfast. This new understanding has provided direction, security, and a completely new standard.

Those little DMs that say, “Good morning, beautiful,” no longer give me butterflies; they feel more like flashing warning signs followed by a simple thought:

Not today, Satan.

I am no longer seeking a love shaped by this world, but patiently waiting for a love that is unconditional, sacrificial, and steadfast.

Some people assume that I live a lonely life, but the truth is far from that. When we walk the path that God has carefully laid before us, people begin to appear — not just anyone, but those rare, solid relationships that form Kingdom friendships, mentorships, and a new kind of family.

Those hours I once spent at home, feeling the weight of loneliness pressing in, have transformed. Now, they are filled with an eager desire to be with God — in prayer, in His Word, and in stillness before Him. The silence that once felt empty now hums with His presence.

You see, when your relationship with God deepens, you never truly feel alone. He knows what you need before you even realize it, and He shows up in ways that remind you over and over again that you are never abandoned.

~ Natasha Metz ~